What is a Life Coach and Do I Need One?

What is a Life Coach and Do I Need One?

It’s been a year of crazy amazingness in my life coaching business. Things have really boomed over here at WIP. My coaching practice is by far the most beautiful part of my life. I love it. So I thought now would be a good time to answer the question, “What is a Life Coach?”

Actually, I probably should have done a post like this wayyyy long ago guys. But I’ve been so busy that I just haven’t had the time. It’s been in my  head itching to get out for a while now. So I’m pretty excited for this blog post today.

So let me tell you about my life and biz! Sound good?

Yup. That’s Me. I am the creator of What is Perfection, but I am also the life coach who designs all the online courses and programs you see in this little WIP world. I do one on one coaching and group coaching and I run an awesome online community (all the links are at the bottom of this post)

 

So on paper I am a “master life coach.” But that’s the short boring answer: I show people who are stuck and sad how to be unstuck and sad with crazy beautiful transformation practices and unicorns.

No but seriously, let me break it down for ya.

LIFE COACHING VS. THERAPY. 

Having a life coach is so different than having a therapist.  Actually, having been on both sides of the couch so to speak, I think life coaching is way better than therapy. But I guess I’m bias. Honesty,  I’ve been to a dozen therapists talking about my painful past and feeling stuck in my life, and the minute I got a life coach, my whole world changed. BOOM. Lightbulb. Eye opener. Total transformation. I manifested the F- out of my life. It was awesome.

So why did that happen? Well because psychology, counseling, and modern therapy, is mainly a practice that focuses on healing from the pain of the past. Life Coaching, on the other hand, is about getting you exactly where you want to be in the present.

THERE IS NO RIGHT OR WRONG.

When it comes to deciding between therapy or coaching, one is not better than the other per say: We all need different things at different times in our lives. But if you’re the action taker go-getter who is feeling stuck – the type of person who wants to make massive changes in her own life – then it may be time to ditch the therapy and seek out a coach.

COACHING IS NOT MOTIVATION.

Life coaching is not about motivating you. I mean sure, it may be super motivating to have a coach guide you through your journey – but it is way less fluffy than it sounds. Life coaching is seriously about instilling greatness in you – teaching you all the emotional skills you need to create the life you deserve. Life coaching gets you to a place where you actually feel motivated to do what you want – sure – but it is more about manifesting all that you desire for your life and your future in a way that is empowering and fulfilling. I have six years of study underneath my belt to become a Life Coach – that wasn’t just so I could learn how to motivate people.

WHAT YOU GET WITH A LIFE COACH.

The guidance you get from a life coach is so different than anything I ever received from therapy or counseling. And most of my clients say the same thing. Life coaching is about getting where you want to be instead of living stuck in the past.

And full disclosure, a lot of my clients actually have therapists too. I do touch on the past with my clients often, but it is all so that we can correct old patterns of thinking and behavior that you’ve been holding onto for a long time. I find that my practice is all about getting my clients to have the right mindset to succeed. It’s all about helping them create the life they are truly hungry for while providing them all the tools they need to keep that momentum going.

So.. life coaching goes a little something like this:

You have a goal. You want to make it happen, but you can’t for some reason.

Or you’re at rock  bottom, sick of failing yourself and ready to try something new.

It could be health related, business related, relationship related.

Whatever it is, you want a change and you are stuck.

Then you get a coach. And boom. It happens.

It’s sounds magical, but seriously, it is.

Yes. totally.

So what kinds of “stuck” people do I work with?

WHAT TYPES OF PEOPLE DO I WORK WITH

I work with women who are struggling to feel confident.

I work with people who are looking to take their online businesses to the next level and can’t break through.

I work with people who are trying to get their children back, who are recently divorced or struggling with hitting rock bottom after an unhealthy relationship.

Basically – I show people how to close that gap of getting from wherever they are to where they want to be. And it works. It’s amazing and beautiful and I love it.

So…. now you know what it’s all about, Let me answer some basic questions I get asked a lot.

THE INS AND OUTS OF MY OWN COACHING PRACTICE

– I do all my 1:1 coaching with clients internationally and nationally online. No I don’t travel to Germany every week to see my client – I actually just have zoom calls with her in my office.

– I am in constant connection to my clients, emailing, messaging, waking them through their journey It’s all about guidance guys. We have 1 hour calls every week but then also are constantly staying connected to make sure the systems we are focused on are integrating well. ( I usually become BFF with my clients.)

-I take on a very select group of clients at a time. I do not work with a crazy amount of women at once because I am 100 percent dedicated to giving them the results they need and want. I can’t really do that if I have too much on my plate.

– There are lots of homework assignments, check ins and challenges along the way. It isn’t a walk in the park. Changing your life is a lot of hard work and that’s why I screen all of my clients. I want to make sure they are seriously ready for the big bad ass changes they want. Sometimes people want things but they are still in that “scared phase.” no no no not here.

More questions? Get at me! Comment below or message me in the FB Group.

xoxox

How to Break a Bad Habit Forever

How to Break a Bad Habit Forever

Full disclosure: I have some pretty bad habits up my sleeve. Some that I am holding onto for now, because I am not ready to commit to the step of letting go, and others I have been trying to quit for years. If you’re honest with yourself, I’m sure you could admit to having a bad habit or two no matter how close to perfect you are.

The question is how do we kick butt and remove an unhealthy habit from our lifestyle? And how do we find the passion and drive to stay committed to quitting a bad habit?

How to Quit a Bad Habit

PART ONE: Steps to Getting Rid of a Bad Habit

Step One: Acknowledging your bad habit it is holding you back. Ask yourself this important question: “How is this bad habit negatively effecting my lifestyle?” When I was a heavy drinker, for example, I needed to recognize that drinking too much was really preventing me from living the life I truly deserved. I knew this. But I guess  I didn’t want to admit it. So I made myself admit it. I got out a pen and paper and I made a list.

Set Two: Make a list of all the reasons your unhealthy habit is negatively influencing you. I’ll give you an example from my personal life just to help you on your own self discovery process. I used to be a heavy drinker. How did I change that? First, I recognized that my drinking was negatively affecting me. Then I listed all the reasons how it was actually doing that. When I was drinking heavily,  I was feeling behind on my weight-loss and healthy goals. I was also holding myself back from emotional balance because whenever I was drinking heavily, I had a hard time relaxing and being present. Most importantly (the biggest eye opener of them all) my heavy drinking was effecting my relationships with others: I would fight a little more often with my boyfriend and my sisters when I was under the influence. And that was a big no no for me. Making that list really made me want to give up drinking. I couldn’t deny the truth when it was staring me in the face.

Step Three: Figuring out exactly what that bad habit provides you. It’s true though, we all get something positive from our bad habits. And we need to acknowledge that too. You cannot get rid of a bad habit without replacing it with a good one. So you need to ask yourself what that bad habit offers you and how it enhances your life. Do you smoke to relax? Maybe you drink to have a good time? Or perhaps you are an overeater who uses food to cope with anxiety. Whatever it is – figure it out.

Step Four: Replacing your unhealthy bad habit with a new healthy habit. It’s easy to pass up the idea of quitting a bad habit when we program our brains to think that the bad habit we love is actually adding value to our lives. But once we get real deep and honest with ourselves, we can recognize how that bad habit enhances our lives and then figure out a new healthy habit to replace it with. Maybe instead of drinking to relax you will go for a walk or meditate. Maybe instead of overeating to cope with anxiety you read a book or paint your nails. Whatever works for you is what you should do.

PART TWO: Finding The Drive to Change NOW.

Step Five: Discover the reasons why you must change this bad habit now as opposed to later on in life. Have you ever known someone who says they want to change but they never do? There is a reason so many people put off the idea of making a positive change for their lives: They don’t have the motivation to make that change NOW. Instead, they just keep putting it off. How many times have you wanted to start a healthy lifestyle and kept telling yourself, “oh I’ll start on Monday.” Or maybe you were trying to quit indulging on sweet foods but kept telling yourself that the holiday’s were around the corner, “Why not wait until after then?” Find the momentum to change your lifestyle NOW. Ask yourself, “What will happen if I don’t make this change NOW in my life? as opposed to two years from now, or next year or next week?” There has to be something about your situation now in life that will give you the urge and desire to take massive action TODAY. Find the reasons.. reflect on those reasons.. and push yourself forward.

Step Six: Implement new healthy habits. Remember how I said bad habits stick around because we get something good from them? What do you get from your bad habit right now? You have to be getting something good or else you wouldn’t be keeping that bad habit around! Does your bad habit relax you? Maybe it gives you something to do and keeps you busy when you are bored. Perhaps your bad habit has become such a routine part of your life that you don’t even remember what that good feeling is that you got from it. Dig deep. Figure it out. You can’t give up a bad habit without replacing it with something new. That’s just the truth. If you don’t find new ways to feel good, you’ll just give up a bad habit, feel bad, and then go back to it! So don’t do that.

 

All of these Steps and more for sustainable bad habit kicking are outlined in my free E-Guide. Come grab it by clicking the button below and start making positive changes to your life today!

badhabitsquittinge-guide

 

 

IS IT LOVE OR AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP?

IS IT LOVE OR AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP?

I’m going to make this simple today. Because for a topic that is so super complicated, being clear and to the point is really important here.

As a Relationship Recovery expert I see a lot of girls struggling to recognize when their relationships are really bad for them.

And I totally get it.

I’ve been there too.

I run a whole group dedicated to helping girls like this (join the community here if you haven’t already.)

We don’t always go into a relationship with low self worth, am I right? But when we find ourselves in an abusive relationship – we slowly start to feel “less than.” Know what I’m talking about? Good. Okay. Here’s a little check list I want you to go through today. Use this list to start figuring out if you’re romantic life is really just an abusive relationship in sheep’s clothing. Get it? okay. Here we go ladies:

 

Top Warning Signs that You are in an Abusive Relationship

lyellowline

 

He is constantly making you feel “less than” good about yourself.

If you are struggling to feel good about yourself on a regular basis, it’s probably not your fault. Nine times out of ten, when we find ourselves in an abusive relationship, we often feel crummy about ourselves too. It is really easy to let the quality of your relationship dictate how you feel about yourself. And if you are feeling less than or not good enough, then maybe it’s time to start asking yourself if your abusive relationship bears those qualities too.

He has you questioning your own loyalty, morals, or values.

I have yet to see a client that is a bad person or heartless partner. Yet, so many of my clients come to me feeling like they are! They actually start believing that maybe they aren’t worth anything better. Here’s why: an abusive relationship causes you to feel that way. Being in an abusive relationship plays tricks on your mind. Because if your partner is constantly being source of aggression, it wouldn’t surprise me if you fall down to his level every once and a while to defend yourself. Is he yelling at you all the time so on a few occasions you yelled back too? Or maybe he called you names and one day you suddenly snapped and called him a jerk face too (or probably something worse.) We try to defend ourselves by speaking the language our partners speak… and if that way of living isn’t in line with our morals, values, or beliefs, well… then we start feeling like we aren’t very good people. (and maybe we deserve this unhealthy mistreatment.) News flash: You are NOT to blame for your situation. And if your abusive relationship has you doubting how kind hearted or good you are, it is a big no no warning sign to walk away.

When you try to work on things and talk, it always turns into an argument.

Ineffective communication is a big red flag. It comes with the territory of being in an abusive relationship, unfortunately. When partners don’t communicate properly, it can really wear you down and start making you feel insignificant. I’ll give you an example: a client of mine was so deeply frustrated in her unhealthy relationship. She kept trying to communicate what she needed and wanted, but it always turned into an argument. She could never tell her partner how she felt without him yelling and screaming back. What happened? Well..she started to believe something was wrong with HER. She started questioning herself – “Why can’t I get my message across clearly?” “What’s wrong with me that he just doesn’t understand.” ….. If this is you.. just know – the problem is not on your side. It’s time to walk away.

You often feel like you want more than what you are getting in the relationship.

Let’s play off that example I just gave for a minute. That client of mine was trying to tell her partner that she needed certain things from him. And he wasn’t reciprocating. A loving healthy relationship should have healthy communication and sense of respect. Check out my post on How to Communicate if you need more help on this. But basically, what I’m saying here is that if you are in need of something, a healthy happy relationship partner should be able to work on giving that to you. If he doesn’t – well then bye bye!

You have lost a lot of your friends and feel very alone.

I’ll keep this one short. When we are in an abusive relationship, our partners may push us away from the people we love. It isn’t because we don’t love them – it’s because we are scared of losing our partner if we don’t distance ourselves. It’s a survival mechanism. And if you’re at a point where you feel like you are alone or without the friends you once had, it’s time to walk away.

OTHER WARNING SIGNS: 

The things that are important to you seem way less important to him.

You feel like a different person than you once were before the relationship.

You cry and yell more than you laugh and love.

You feel scared to talk or bring up certain things.

You changed your personality in the relationship

IF THIS IS YOU: START HERE

self improvement courses what is perfection

bluelineswhatisperfection

 

 

February WIP Girl Calendar

February WIP Girl Calendar

The Calendar for February is live ladies! So excited!

If your checking this out for the first time, scratching your head like, “what the heck is this?” let me clue you in.

Every month, as part of being a free member of the WIP GIRL Community, you get access to this fun free Calendar!

Not a member of the group yet? Come join here

I am so excited for February guys. It’s going to be the month of big crazy growth and transformation. – Spring time is around the corner!

CLICK HERE TO DOWNLOAD THE PDF TO PRINT THE CALENDAR

 

CHECK OUT THE AMAZON WORKBOOK COLLECTION!

 

XOXOXOX

 

 

When you want to be a brand new you….

When you want to be a brand new you….

The Brand New Me online course starts in FOUR days…

And it has me thinking about my own journey to self-love..the moment I made a decision to change my life….

Trust me… it wasn’t a small project. I was financially bankrupt, finally out of an unhealthy relationship, lost on my own for the first time, about 60 pounds over weight and so super fed up with every area of my life.

I knew I deserved better and that life wasn’t supposed to be something you “just settled for.” So I decided I was going to do everything in my damn power to create the life I truly deserved.  A life that made me HAPPY.  A life that I could feel appreciative of and love, and take pride in.

That meant I needed to do a lot of changing inside myself.

I had to overcome a lot of limiting beliefs….  stop feeling like a failure, insecure, and worthless and start taking massive action.  I needed to let go of letting other people control my destiny – what they thought of me and what they labeled me as in my life.  I had to discover the tools for changing my emotional state in an instant, start growing my confidence and stop constantly failing my goals over and over and over again.

Basically I had A LOT to learn. And yes, in the beginning all of the things I wanted felt impossible.

Confidence. Happiness. Full self-love.  Healthy relationships. True Love. A stable non chaotic life. A body I was proud of. A healthy lifestyle I enjoyed.

Guess what. I got all of it. It happened. For REAL.

If you are the WIP Girl out there who is still struggling to change her life… the girl who can’t feel good about herself.. the girl who knows she deserves better but can’t figure out HOW to make that change happen…

Get off the hamster wheel gorgeous girl. Make a decision that you deserve better for yourself. Stop setting and start striving. Set your goals and get clear about EXACTLY what you want. And then put on your super girl costume and freaking fight for it girl!

1.Decide you deserve better then the way you have been living.

2. Start believing that you *and only you* have the power to change this.

3. Take massive massive action to create your dream life.

 

The Brand New Me six week online course is starting in four days.. our girls are prepping and preparing for their amazing journeys – setting goals and visualizing what they want to change about their lives….

 

And there is still time left to enroll.

Check out the Brand New Me Course Details here

Everything about this course is focused on showing you how to drastically transform your life, find self confidence and be the version of you that you have been longing to be.

If you read my story about where I was prior to being a life coach and the leader of What is Perfection and the WIP Girl community, you know that my life was a rock bottom rollercoaster disaster. Drugs, Abuse, Eating disorders, Financial disasters, suicide attempts. ALL of it is in my “before WIP resume.”

But guess what? That is NOT me any more. I stopped failing myself years ago. And four years later I have put everything I know into this six week program to help catapult you into that amazing beautiful life you deserve.

There are still 4 Days left to enroll in the Brand New Me Six week online course.

And if you are that girl out there struggling to finally be that version of yourself that you know is in there… go fight for her.

Because remember: Where you are, is NOT where you have to be.