How to Stop Stressing Out about Money: Even if you are broke.

How to Stop Stressing Out about Money: Even if you are broke.

Yesterday I posed a question to the Facebook group about New Year problems. I asked WIP Girls – “What’s keeping you up at night?” I wanted to know what was going on from my girls this month so I could figure out exactly how to help them. (if you haven’t joined yet, check out the Facebook group here.) I usually get all different kinds of feedback when I ask questions like that. But this time around, almost everyone had the same pain point with the new year!

And no it wasn’t feeling overweight or struggling with a healthy new year diet. It was all  about the Benjamin’s baby.

Yes. MONEY. FINANCES. BUDGET. Those icky words we hate hearing. Those big adult words we just want to run away from and pretend don’t exist. Those scary responsible words that just make you want run back into kindergarten class and hide under the blankets during nap time with a juice box.

Not like I’ve tried to do that or anything…..

The words may seem scary, but I’m putting them right in front of your face today. There is no ignoring those words in this post. No earmuffs allowed.

Because today  I want you to face the truth.. even if it hurts.

Here it is:

If you are stressing about money, you are doing something wrong.

This is coming from me. The girl who once had a cushy job as a news producer in manhattan – who walked away from all of that with zero prospects lined up.

Yes. I am a loony lady. I got rid of my apartment, put all of my things in storage, and started a business from the ground up. And What is Perfection was born.

Was I scared? You bet your ass I was.

Was I sometimes stressed about money? “Stressed” is an understatement.

But I learned some really big things in my first year of business – grown up things about money and mindset – that have transformed my level of happiness.

Now the thought of money doesn’t even make me bat an eyelash. Zen Buddha girl status over here.

If I compare my full year without a corporate job or steady income running What is Perfection, to the very last year I spent working at CBS with a consistent paycheck. 401k and health benefits –

Guess which lifestyle was more stressful?


Yes. Without a job, without cushy benefits – I am actually happier and more financially at ease than I was working back then.

How the heck did THAT Happen you ask? (I hope you are asking that because you are reading this post after all.)

Well… A few small changes had a BIG effect on me.

I changed my money stories. I changed my relationship with money. I changed how I felt about it and what it meant to me.

It’s easier than you think.

And if you are that person out there living paycheck to paycheck – the girl who every month is drinking her bottle of wine trying to pay those last final bills to make ends meet – listen up: You are in the right place to say bye bye to all of that. I’m going to show you how with today’s post.

Don’t worry love…. and sorry in advance if I sound like your annoying old grandma telling you what to do. Like her, I am saying these things because I love you.

How to Stop Stressing Out About Money.

Stop thinking money is scarce.

Money is scarce because you are making it scarce. And no, I don’t mean that you aren’t making enough or that you are spending too much. No. Really. That’s not what this is about. Money is scarce because the minute you get it, you feel like it’s going to disappear. Scarcity is a mindset – and you can’t have it. Especially when it comes to money. It is the reason that so many people overeat (because they feel like when the cookies are in the house they need to eat them before they disappear.) It is the reason that people in unhealthy relationships can start smothering their partners (because they feel that love always disappears so they try to grab as much of it as they can before it’s gone.) And if you are nodding your head yes to those two examples, I am sorry to tell you – the same is true for your money. When you live in scarcity mode, you think money is going to disappear. So what do you do? You RUSH to appreciate and enjoy it the minute you get it.

Stop it girl. Get rid of that limiting belief that money isn’t scarce and get real about the facts: you are the one who will make it scarce with your negative mindset!

Stop telling yourself b.s. stories that you will always have money problems.

I used to be the girl who had money problems… so I guess I feel entitled to say this. I was 60 thousand dollars in debt, homeless and without a paycheck at one point in my life. Where am I now? Well – no debt, a successful business, a happy life and a beautiful home that I own. WEEEE!!! I am no different than you. I am not special or unique or one of a kind. I simply started thinking differently about money problems.

Just a days ago Matt’s car broke down. That same day  he broke his arm. Suddenly in one weekend we had to get his car fixed, get his arm taken care of and (yes, you guessed it) spend a LOT of money. This is something that would have totally stressed me out in the past. Especially because of my money problems and how I grew up. But one thing I learned this past year is that when you tell yourself B.S. stories about how a Money problem is a BIG CRAZY UNFIXABLE disaster – it will always be looked at that way in your life. Back in the day if I was in a situation like that – with a medical bill and car repair all in 24 hours – I would have had a nervous breakdown, cried and ran for the hills. But today, I can just tell myself, “Okay. This is temporary. No permanent problem here!” What’s the big deal about having a little extra charge on my credit card this month? I just make it a point to adjust how I am living until it is paid off. Yes.. sounds too good to be true to live life thinking like that right?

But trust me – if you try to adapt all of these mindsets, this one will come easier than you think.

Stop living like you are poor.

“We can’t afford that.” or “I don’t have the money for that right now.” Guys… I NEVER tell myself these things. Even if they are sort of true. Having the mindset “I can’t afford that right now,” is only going to keep you feeling stuck in your life. I am not saying go out and put a pair of Jimmy Choos’ on credit (more on that in the next mindset tip) but really – you are not poor. You have a roof over your head, you have clothes on your back – you have a million things to be grateful for. And if you are reading this post – you have internet too… sorry to say it – you are doing JUST FINE.

It sounds so harsh and cold, but the truth is we all have this “never enough” mentality. We start thinking that we need to have it all in order to not consider ourselves lower class. But when you live your life with the mindset of “I can’t afford it,” you never will.

Being able to pay for things is not about having the right resources – it is about resourcefulness and finding the way to make it happen. No matter what. If you want something, you will damn sure as hell figure out a way.

Redefine your idea of ‘an investment’ vs. ‘a waste of money.’ Aka. Good debt vs. bad debt.

Okay.. This is going to be SUPER hard to hear guys. Everything you learned about “good debt vs. bad debt” is b.s. I want to tell you something about your expenses and how you live your life – go pull out your statement last month and look at everything you bought that was over twenty dollars and ask yourself these questions:

Did this purchase make you a better person or enhance your life in any way?

The emotional connection you have to your purchases is the strongest biggest most important thing to look at guys.

Did you buy a new outfit that you didn’t really need just because you thought it would make you feel better about yourself? Did it? And will it continue to do so?

Or did you invest in a self improvement course or a new book because you believed it would make you a better more successful more happy person?

Do you see the difference here? One has a return on it’s investment, the other does not.

Now look.. I am not saying you need to go through your budget and curse yourself for every single item you ever bought that was just for that temporary satisfaction – but I am saying those purchases should always be left to a minimum on your expense list.

Majority of your purchases you should be able to go through and say – yes. I needed this, it enhanced my life, it made me better, and I know it will pay off having purchased this in the future.


Stop relying on money to make you happy.

And the final most important thing to remember – stop buying shit just to get high from it. Fill your life with meaning and value that can’t be defined by the label in your jeans.

There’s more to life than that ladies.



P.s. Did you join the WIP Girl Community Group?


The Most Valuable Life Lessons of 2016

The Most Valuable Life Lessons of 2016

I cannot believe that in just two days 2017 will be over. It seems absolutely crazy to me. Maybe it’s the fact that time goes super fast when you are running your own business. Or maybe it’s because I hit so many big milestones this year. But whatever it is, I can’t believe that the year is soon over.

Seriously. Where did the time go?

Every New Year, I reflect back on everything that happened the twelve months before, asking myself if it was everything I wanted it to be.

Did I do everything I promised myself I would do this year? Did I actually achieve my goals? Was this year a happy year? Was it an “accomplished,” year?

It’s almost like I try to find that one word to describe the sum of 365 days. And this year, especially, it feels impossible.

To come up with that one “perfect” word to describe this past year doesn’t work this time around. It was happy and exciting, yes. But 2016 was also a year of big changes. It was a year of growing pains and hard lessons. A year where I grew into myself and What is Perfection blossomed.

But through all of that, there were some seriously important lessons worth sharing.


The most valuable life lessons of 2016

Not everyone is going to like you or the choices you make in your life.

I guess this is a lesson I learned years ago, but ever since I launched WIP, the universe started reminding me about this one – slipping in little challenges along the way. Like when I wrote about my rape and sexual assault on the blog, and got some pretty harsh feedback. Some family members thought I was being too open. I thought I was helping other people. Or the time when I took a big leap in my monthly goals last November, and decided to get real and more vulnerable in the WIP Girl Facebook Community Group.  I was scared to be real and vulnerable at first.. because a coach, I think I’m supposed to be Perfect MYSELF, but the truth is opening up without worrying about being “accepted” or “approved of” is one of the best things I ever did for my happiness. Hence my post how to stop caring about what other people think of you.

Being successful at something means you are going to have to fail a million times.

Boy oh boy. As an entrepreneur, let me tell you… this is a hard one that I learned this year. It really is true when you think about it – the most successful people are also the people who’ve failed the MOST in their life. But because they fail so often, they force themselves to learn from their failure and grow stronger. That is success. And running my own company, I see that to be true now more than ever.

Even when it comes to personal goals – healthy lifestyle plans, or just trying to find happiness in a healthy relationship – whatever you are trying to achieve – it is okay to fail a few time before you get it right. It doesn’t mean that you aren’t successful or don’t have your shit together.. it just means you are working at learning the big important lessons that will make you a rockstar in the future.

The road to Perfection is about progress.

I have tried taking the journey to Perfection so many times in my life. I struggled with my self worth and constantly felt like I needed to be Perfect in order to be happy. That journey was a dead end. It got me know where in life. I now know the truth – and it’s what I coach other girls on accepting in their own self love journeys – when you embrace progress -rather than striving for perfection – the doors to an amazing beautiful confident happy life will open. It’s as simple as that.

Self Love is key to living a happy life.

Call it self love, self worth, appreciation, whatever. You need it. It ALWAYS needs to be at the forefront of your life. Because self love is the magical mindset where dreams come true. It is the place where you start believing that you can accomplish things. It’s the focus that you need to invest in yourself because you are “worth that big dream life you always wanted.” Self Love is the source of happiness. Without it – dreams never become reality. You need to love yourself enough to believe you are capable of doing whatever it is your heart desires.


And so, with that… goodbye 2016.


Raise Your Standards and Start Being Happy.

Raise Your Standards and Start Being Happy.

Bad news bears alert: Settling for less than you deserve is a shit way to live. Seriously. The shittiest. I mean, duh, we pretty much all know that right? We’ve heard the “raise your standards” lecture so many times before:


“Don’t stay in a shitty job if you hate it.
Stop dating the jerk if he doesn’t treat you right.
Let go of that friend who is taking advantage of you.
Stand up for yourself when that girl at work is bullying you.”


We’ve heard it a bunch of different ways. But all that advice has the same translation: Raise your standards and stop settling for shitty things.

But here’s the problem when it comes to wanting to raise your standards: It’s obvious that you should do it, but very few people know how to. Why is it such a hard lesson to learn? And how exactly do you raise your standards when you have been constantly living life settling for less than you deserve? If you’re the girl asking those questions, keep reading. Because I’m going to tell you.



raise your standards what is perfection


Why You Need to Raise Your Standards

First, I need to hammer home the point that learning to raise your standards is actually super important. Because why would you do try to even do it if it wasn’t such a big deal? And it IS A BIG DEAL! Why? Because it totally effects EVERYTHING about you.

Your life is a direct reflection of the standards you hold.

Don’t believe me? Is the concept too fluffy or theoretical to you? Let me break it down for you: If you don’t feel good about yourself, you are never going to attract a life that feels good for you. If you don’t feel valuable to yourself, you won’t attract people who value you either. If you don’t think you are worth anything, say goodbye to that sexy office and promotion you want so badly.

But forget about the world around you for a minute – think about why you should raise your standards for yourself.


If you don’t have high standards for what being “healthy” means – how can you possibly find the drive to take care of your body? – Keep smoking those cigarettes, eating that fried food and avoiding that treadmill.

If you don’t have high standards for the quality of your life – meaning living a fulfilling happy joyful one – how can you possibly go after your dreams and goals? – Forget that dream of advancing your career or going back for your masters degree.

And most importantly, let’s talk about LOVE: If you don’t have a strong sense of what you deserve in your love life, how can you possibly find something better than the relationship you have right now? – Go ahead, stay stuck in that unhealthy unhappy relationship.

I hope you get my point here.

What we think of ourselves, and the standards we have, directly effects our life in every single way. And if you want a better life, you simply need to raise your standards.



So, Now You Need to Raise Your Standards

Here’s how you do it. It’s simple, it’s easy, and it works.


cutehearttealwipIdentify what areas of your life are making you unhappy right now.

Are you feeling stuck in a really destructive unhealthy relationship with someone? Maybe you feel like you don’t prioritize yourself enough and are constantly avoiding that self care time you really deserve. Perhaps you feel like you need to focus more on your health and start taking care of your body. Make a list of all the areas of your life that you are struggling with right now, and identity what specifically is making you unhappy. If you are unhappy in a certain area of your life, most of the time it is because you are compromising what you really want for yourself. Identify the issues so you can raise your standards and fix those problem areas.


Figure out what limiting beliefs are holding you back.

This is a huge component of my one on one coaching and the online courses I run for Personal development. Behind every low standard you have for yourself is a limiting belief that you can’t have anything better or don’t deserve anything better. So ask yourself, in those areas of your life that you seem to be unhappy, what limiting beliefs do you have that are keeping you from going after something better.


Create new positive empowering beliefs.

You can’t just stop thinking negatively about yourself. You need to replace whatever limiting belief you have with a POSITIVE EMPOWERING one. So if you’re old belief was “I will never find someone better to love me,” replace that limiting belief with this: “I am a beautiful, gorgeous woman who deserves to be loved and cared for in every which way.”


Find the facts to back up that belief.

Build your confidence, figure out exactly what tangible evidence you have in your life to support your new empowering belief. Come up with all the reasons you are beautiful, worth it,, deserving, and capable. Get real and honest with yourself… and start showing yourself a little bit of love. In my experience coaching my clients, this is one of the hardest steps to take in the process of learning to raise your standards. So many women feel insecure learning how to redefine their self worth and love. If you are struggling, go check out my affordable coaching programs here.


Identify what you want, and what you will no longer tolerate.

This is huge in the process of learning to raise your standards. Once you figure out all the reasons you are deserving and capable of improving your life, you need to recognize wha you will NO LONGER tolerate. Take a stand, identify all the of the things you refuse to “settle for.” Set a date on the calendar and come up with a plan to start living to a higher standard. Promise yourself you will no longer tolerate X, Y, and Z, in your life.


Invest in your personal development.

Learning how to raise your standards is only a small part of building your confidence. And like any new hobby or habit, you need to educate yourself, become informed and retrain your brain to think differently. If you are the girl out there ready to make a positive change for herself, and her worth, take a big bold step and sign up for a 30 day transformation course. Go to the store and get personal development books. Start journaling. Whatever works for you and your budget. Knowing your worth and investing in yourself is a great amazing way to raise your standards. Probably one of the best.


Ready for a big step? Get the top rated program for transforming your confidence and healing your heartbreak!


Check out my 30 Day Broken to Beautiful Course!



Six Ways to Constantly Better Yourself

Six Ways to Constantly Better Yourself

Yo girl who wants to improve her life: Whatuppp?  How you doinnnn (insert awkward smile here) Okay. Now let’s get down to biz. Want to better yourself but don’t know how? Don’t worry. I got you.

When I started my self love journey I felt totally lost. I had no idea how to better myself and shake my lack of self-worth.

I wanted to lose weight, have healthier relationships, be better at my job – you know.. just like.. not suck so much. That was super overwhelming. “Where the heck do I start?” I was asking myself.  Because it seemed like I had so much I wanted to change. And I wanted it to be easier.

better yourself - what is perfection

Because doing the actual hard work myself seemed super scary. Seriously. Why couldn’t I just snap my fingers and have a magic fairy godmother swoop down and transform me. Easy peasy right?

It took me a long time to take that big leap of faith and just start making those amazing changes for my life! Slowly, overtime, I started to realize that I didn’t need to change everything about my life all at once.  (Not like that would have happened anyway, even if I tried.)

But I knew if I opened my heart to learning new things, then I could improve myself over time. I just needed to take small steps towards bettering myself each and every day.

So if you’re like I used to be, wondering how to make that improvement to better yourself, then keep calm and read on!

6 Ways to Constantly Be Bettering Yourself


Six Ways to Continually Better Yourself

Continually practice self reflection.

You will never better yourself without self reflection. Case and point. Take a deep hard look at yourself and start asking questions: Who am I? What makes me love myself? How can I grow? What makes me happy in life? By asking yourself these simple questions we take for granted, you can start discover the unique path for bettering yourself. Need help with this? Then you need to check out this post.

Read as many books as possible.

The first step in learning how to better yourself is letting down your ego. Seriously – get rid of that pompous attitude that you know everything. You clearly don’t know it all if you are feeling stuck or in need of growth. Set a goal for yourself to read as many self improvement books as you can. I usually aim to read a new one each month. Learning from experts will help you move faster on the better yourself train. If you need help finding that perfect book for you, feel free to browse through some of the self improvement book reviews I’ve posted on the blog.

Set goals, reach them and then make new ones

One of the biggest most valuable lessons I have learned on the journey of self improvement and personal development is that growth NEVER ends. Seriously. You should always be trying to improve and grow yourself. Let go of the belief that you are only trying to better yourself to reach some big end goal. Because once you reach that big goal of yours, you should be setting ANOTHER one! Yup. You heard that right. Multiple goal setting and continuous improvement is what it’s all about.

better yourself what is perfection

Get a mentor. Find a rolemodel.

Finding an expert to help guide you on your self improvement journey (whether it is for your health goals or biz goals or any other goals) is a big awesome positive step. When you find a role model and mentor, you can learn from their mistakes. You can bounce ideas off of them. You can model the things they’ve done to succeed in the way you are trying to succeed. Finding a coach or an expert who is a pro in doing what you are trying to do for yourself is so valuable. Especially if you have been trying to do this thing for years and haven’t been successful yet. Finding a coach is key to changing your path and making success a possibility for you.

Try new things and be open to change

As a self improvement leader and confidence coach, I see so many girls struggling to accomplish simple things like feeling happy and good about themselves. They keep setting the same goals for their bodies or their lives and they keep failing. 9/10 of these girls are constantly trying the same thing over and over and expecting different results. Ever heard the definition of insanity? Well, that’s basically it. If you are constantly trying to accomplish the same thing over and over again the same exact way, you will never be successful. So keep analyzing your improvement journey. Figure out what is working and what isn’t. Keep changing your approach until you find one that works for you.

Invest in yourself.

One of the biggest things I hear from girls who are trying to better themselves, grow and change is that they want to, but  they feels scared to invest in themselves. “I want to hire this coach or join that program, but I just don’t have the money right now.” Well, I hate to break it to you, but if you don’t invest in yourself, you can’t better yourself. By taking big massive action to improve your life, you can drastically push yourself out of the “maybe zone” and turn your wants into MUSTS.

Hope these tips help you on your journey to better yourself!

And if you’re the type of girl reading this feeling like, “OH EM GEE I’M READY,” then you need to check out the Perfection Program. Better yourself in this amazing community with a program that works.

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What is Perfection is the Self Improvement blog for the imperfect girl everywhere. Learn to find happiness, feel beautiful, and be confident in who you are. We all deserve to be happy, and we all deserve to be the best version of us. And we all are truly capable of getting there. Because Perfection Is Impossible. Happiness isn’t. See The Self Improvement E-Guide Collection For Your Life Coaching Guides to Change Your Life Today!

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A Peek into My Office Space!

A Peek into My Office Space!

Ever since I became an entrepreneur, I’ve become even more obsessed with my desk/office area. Now, if you know me personally, you’re probably thinking that’s crazy – since I was already so obsessed with my desk. But it’s for a good reason. Now that I work from home as a full time blogger and life coach, my inspirational workspace is the most important part of my home. It is basically life.

Because I LOVVEEEE me a sexy motivational desk area.  And if I don’t have one, I go crazy. No joke.

Forget about working… when my desk is a mess, it sets me off into crazy town.

To be clear, I’m not really a clean freak. I’m fine skipping out on the laundry for two weeks and letting the dishes pile up. Sometimes I even forget t to sort through the mail. All that is totes fine with me. But if my desk isn’t organized or if my inspirational workspace is cluttered, then we have a serious problem in Lauren land. I’ve become somewhat of a pro in the art of creating an inspirational workspace. So today I am sharing my tips so you can do it too!


desk organizing ideas what is perfection


Creating an Office Area that Inspires You.

I am a firm believer that certain environments give off different energy vibes. If you are constantly working in different places, or if you don’t have a desk to call your own, you are more likely to feel stressed, disoriented and chaotic in your daily work routine.

I can definitely attest to this. I get much more work done at my desk than I do when I bring my laptop in bed or to a coffee shop to work. The quality of my work is reliant on my inspirational office area.

So since I know how important it is to have an inspirational workspace, I make it a priority. When Matt and I moved into a small temporary space this past winter, I had one requirement: There MUST be room for my desk.

inspirational workspace what is perfection

How to Create a Motivational Workspace

Here are my solid simple tips for making your own inspirational workspace that rocks.

1. Create a space that represents you. My office area is a representation of ME. And I LUVVVV that. Having an inspirational workspace that has me feeling connected to my own passions and identity keeps me continuously positive during my workday. Honestly, without my own special space, I am not sure where I would be. So when I decorate my desk, I always look to feature decorative items that make me feel connected to my soul. The koala I have next to my computer for example reminds me of my boyfriend. He calls me his koala (because I am always sleeping) It’s a silly little inside love joke just between us, but when I see this little koala every day, it reminds me of the reasons why I work so hard. Because I love him, duh.

2. Fill your inspirational workspace with positive symbolism. See that dictionary that’s propping up my Mac computer? I got it from a producer I worked with at CBS News. I thought he was a genius. But then he got fired. I saved this dictionary as a constant reminder that sometimes even the best of us fail. It keeps me focused on my mission to learn and grow and also keeps me humble. It’s a solid reminder that even the smartest people in the world still learn hard lessons.

inspirational workspace what is perfection

3. Fill your inspirational workspace with quotes that speak to you. I love looking at this dish on my desk. Sometimes it’s covered with little paperclips and I lose sight of the quote on there. But when I get a chance to look at it, the quote makes me feel so happy, inspired and relaxed. So, when you are designing your inspirational workspace, be sure to find some quotes to display at your desk area. Whether they are framed quotes, notebooks with quotes, or ceramic piece of inspiration, it doesn’t matter. Having a few scattered positive quotes across your inspirational workspace can help you push through those tough days when you aren’t feeling as creative or motivated.

4. Keep the clutter away. I am a firm believer in keeping my inspirational workspace as organized as possible. So keep your office area as organized as possible. Get folders or a nice file bin to keep your paperwork clutter off your desk. Buy bins to store your markers, crayons or extra electrical cords. Keeping the clutter out of site will keep you more focused on whatever work you are doing that day. I do keep some beautiful notebooks shelved on the top of my desk for decoration. But most of my research material and office supplies is stored away in bins or in nice organized piles underneath my desk. That way I have nothing to distract me while I am working.

inspirational workspace what is perfection

5. Keep a thematic color scheme. I have so much of that gorgeous blues and pastel teal color scattered in my inspirational workspace. I love those colors. They make me feel so happy and positive. Having a few books and decorative pieces with those color tones on my desk keeps me feeling positive in my work environment. Not to mention it also keeps me focused because that’s the beautiful WIP brand color! So when you create your inspirational office area, find a few colors that speak to you and play off of them when you decorate. I am not saying you need to go out and get everything super matchy matchy. but pulling a strong color scheme through your workspace keeps the positive mood you created continuous and focused.

I hope you enjoyed my little tips today! More to come on the blog. Do you have any favorite inspirational workspace items? Share them with me, I would love to check them out! Oh.. and if you are a blogger, check out my other blogging posts in the lifestyle section here.

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What is Perfection is the Self Improvement blog for the imperfect girl everywhere. Learn to find happiness, feel beautiful, and be confident in who you are. We all deserve to be happy, and we all deserve to be the best version of us. And we all are truly capable of getting there. Because Perfection Is Impossible. Happiness isn’t. See The Self Improvement E-Guide Collection For Your Life Coaching Guides to Change Your Life Today!

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