This Month’s Detox!

This Month’s Detox!

Cleanse & Restore

How are you feeling?
Have you been feeling sluggish, distracted, foggy, overwhelmed, bloated, tired, kind of icky, and in need of a bodily re-boot? Is it time to flush toxic “build up” from modern living?   Do you want more energy and to stop craving foods that taste good then feel bad?  Are you tired of indigestion, heartburn, gas, bloating and/or constipation? Would you like to have clearer, glowing skin and the peace of mind that you are taking action towards a healthy future?
How can I Cleanse & Restore?
With this 30-Day program, using high quality essential oils and supplements to cleanse, detoxify, and bring your digestive tract into a state of healthy balance, you will begin to cleanse and restore your body naturally.Whatever it is that is drawing you here, how awesome would it be to treat your body to a cleanse after the binges of the holiday season? How much better could you feel? How much healthier could you be? How much more energy could you have? Are you curious? Would you like to find out?Commit to your 30-Day Cleanse.  It’s an excellent way to detoxify and take charge of your health with a focus on vibrant health!
Challenge Overview
Days 1-10: Build a solid foundation of nutritional support through micronutrients, healthy fatty-acids, and antioxidants; prepare for healthy elimination and detoxification using enzymes and a blend of essential oils.Days 11-20: Add GI (gastrointestinal) support, as well as cleansing of the liver, kidneys, and colon.Days 21-30: Add the repopulation of healthy microflora in the GI Tract.Throughout this challenge, you will be encouraged to enhance your cleansing experience by engaging in moderate exercise, choosing high quality, whole foods, simplifying your life, and de-cluttering your personal environment.  Your program begins with a one-one consultation with Rebecca and ends with another one-one call.  Throughout your 30-day program, you can ask questions and get the support you need throughout the program via the private FB group.

This is not about starvation, dieting, or deprivation.  This is about giving yourself a gift: holistic health, from the inside out.

This is an opportunity for you to choose real food, rebuild your adrenals (most likely burned out and fatigued from stress), and boost your metabolism naturally, while learning new ways to live a healthy life beyond the 30 days.


Your Tool Kit (The Cleanse and Restore Enrollment Kit $245) 
-Cleanse & Restore Enrollment Kit
Lifelong Vitality Pack, Zendocrine Softgels, TerraZyme, GX Assist, PB Assist+, Lemon Essential Oil
-Private FB group and coaching community
-One-One Support & Access to Me!

How to Grab Your Detox Kit:
1) Visit
2) Enroll as a free “wellness advocate” account.
3) After inputting your information, choose the Cleanse & Restore Enrollment Kit
*Not sure? Contact me directly to walk you through the steps.* – CONTACT
Let me know if you have questions.

10 Ways Essential Oils Changed My Life

10 Ways Essential Oils Changed My Life

So what the heck is this crazy oil nonsense I keep spewing on social media? It’s not nonsense – but it is crazy how in just two years these little oils have changed my life. And I need to talk about it.

You guys know from all of my recent meditation posts on the blog that I am so into my spiritual practice lately. Seriously it is soooooo my jam right now. I wake up, go into my meditation room, get in zen mode and that is how I start my day almost every day.

Its the bees knees.

But I wasn’t always like this. The truth is emotional wellness wasn’t really my thing for quite a  while. I lived life like an emotional rollercoaster all the damn time.

But then I found my spiritual practice and it changed everything. So today I wanted to take some time to break down one of my favorite most vital self love saviors: Essential oils.



What are Essential Oils?

Essential oils are nature’s finest purest form of plant life condensed into a little bottle. Cold pressed oils derived from plants. I have Lavender oil (which I use for sleep time) Melaleuca Tea Tree Oil (which I use for my skin) and Orange oil (which I use to make the house smell beautiful.) I use these oils for a whole lot more but basically the point I want to get at is that these little bottles contain 100 percent pure plant oil – and all different types of plants!

How do you use them?

I get this question a lot. You can diffuse them, apply them topically on the skin, or you can ingest them (depending on the plant) But you can also make a lot of really awesome beauty recipes. I no longer use store bought soaps or shampoo anymore thanks to these bad boys.



Now the big breakdown: The 10 Biggest Ways Essential Oils Changed my Life

1.I no longer have depression or anxiety. And I no longer have to take medication for those things after 10 years. Yup. No joke. I use oils in my meditation practice and I wear them topically all the time and they literally cured my anxiety. Aromatherapy is a real thing guys. It works. Ask the google.

2. I no longer need to take sleeping aids to go to bed and I sleep blissfully through the night every single night. Coming from the girl who couldn’t sleep 3 hours straight without waking up from a nightmare or stress – I fall asleep within seconds of hitting the pillow now with diffusing lavender oil in the room. My fiancé says he sleeps better too!

3. I don’t need to be cold medication when we get sick because oils clear up my sinus’ every time. I put peppermint oil underneath my nose and BOOM. gone.

4. My house smells like Martha Stewart lives here all the damn time. Orange oil – Rosemary Oil, Lemon oil – the list goes on .. Every time I am diffusing oils in the kitchen my heart warms up. Plus I avoid allergy issues and soy candles.. so that’s cool.

5.  Speaking of Allergies. I have zero. Yes. Zero. I totally attribute this to using oils and keeping my sinuses healthy with the oils I diffuse all the time in the house.

6. I heal migraines and neck pain instantly with oils. Its a LIFE SAVER. There’s an oil called Deep blue that I use and it saves me every time. a little bit on my neck and back and boom I’m all better!

7. My spiritual practice is crazy beautiful with oils. I meditate and manifest my desires. I can say prayers for self love and abundance and receive what I am looking for.. Each oil and plant  has a deep spiritual root that is tied to enhancing and releasing certain emotions like fear, stress anxiety, overwhelm, doubt, anger, rage, depression. I mean it is crazy awesome what these oils do for my mind.

8. My beauty care rituals are on fleek (*if that’s still a thing*) Yeah..people are always asking how I make my skin so clear and I just tell them – it’s the oils! no wrinkles, no bags, no pimples. IT’s awesome.

9. I have continual self confidence and self love. The minute I started working with these bad boys, so much changed. My confidence grew, my inner awareness developed, my intuition blossomed. It was awesome. Seriously. I swear these little oil bottles are my secret to constant confidence and self love.

10. Peace is now a practice and a choice I can make every single day. No matter what I am always grounded and clear minded.


Now it’s your turn.

If you want to get started on oils, this is always the kit I recommend – its 100 percent therapeutic grade and beautiful. This month (May) if you enroll you get 50 dollars back – which is awesome. This is the “Aromatouch diffuser kit.”

Go to – and then register as a free “wellness advocate.” after you create your account it will ask you to pick a kit. This is the Aromatouch diffuser kit.

It’s beautiful. Comes with everything shown here.

Questions? get at me on Facebook. I’ll help you out!

My 3 Day Juice Cleanse in LA!

My 3 Day Juice Cleanse in LA!

Okay… so I am back from Los Angeles with a million blog post ideas. Well.. No.. more like a million blog post ideas, video ideas and program outlines. Yup. Los Angeles was amazing. And super inspiring.

If you don’t know already, I traveled to the West Coast for a week to attend Tony Robbin’s event called UPW – Unleash the Power Within. It was amazing. I actually went last year too. It was a totally different experience. This time, I wasn’t focused on me – I was focused on what I could learn for the clients I coach!

If you don’t know much about it, UPW is a 4 day event that focuses on literally unleashing your power. There is a lot of dancing, a lot of intense learning, a lot of hypnosis, and a huge amount of educational information to absorb. I literally have a 2 inch notebook jam packed with information I need to share.

Tony’s events aren’t just for life coaches and personal development leaders –  A lot of people who are struggling in their life go to Tony’s events to get help.

We are always trying to improve. We are always growing. And his events hold safe space for anyone and everyone to transform into a better version of themselves. It is truly beautiful.

So yes, I was there for my clients, but I was also there for me. My weight has sort of exploded in the last year. The business boomed and so did my belly. I knew going into this event I wanted to resolve all of my emotional issues related to health and wellness.. and with that, I decided to do a cleanse while I was at the event!  Yes. I totally took the experience to the next level and did a 3 day juice cleanse. Thanks to the amazing company  Pressed Juicery, it was actually easy, and enjoyable. Not to mention it felt AMAZING.


Juicing can be hard. But it doesn’t have to be. Honestly, I used to be afraid of juice cleansing long ago. But honestly it isn’t as scary as it sounds. It’s been a while since I’ve juiced, so getting back into the habit was hard in the beginning. I was really lucky to find Pressed Juicery in LA. They delivered all of my juices on time (I got to order them in advance and pick the day of delivery.)  Their juices were so fresh and delicious. So today I wanted to take some time to share my experience and break down everything you need to know about juice cleanses. So in case you want to try one, keep reading!



First, an awesome amazing shout out to Pressed Juicery. Their juices were delicious, and so fresh. They delivered everything in a seamless process the day before I was arriving n LA so I didn’t’ even have to worry. Some people say juicing is expensive, but honestly, I was traveling and I would have to eat out anyway! Their juices are really affordable and I ended up saving money not having to eat out the first three days of my trip. They packed everything with icepacks and in a temperature controlled package in the box so I didn’t have to worry about the juices going bad. I had my friend pick up the package and store it in her freezer before I got there. So that’s really the first lesson we need to jump into:

The Company you Pick to buy juices from totally matters guys. Find a company you trust. 

I was traveling to Los Angeles and was away from home, so I wasn’t sure what juice companies were good and which ones were bad. So I took time to do some research. After a little googling and Yelp surfing of local LA Juice bars, I decided to go with Pressed Juicery. Their prices were reasonable and their juices were really clean and fresh.Finding a company you trust is really important when it comes to juice cleansing. You want to make sure your juices are fresh and healthy and made to order. The last thing you want is chemicals or processed foods in your juice cleanse. So.. .onto point number two!

Check the ingredients in your juices before you commit to a specific brand. 

Whatever company you choose, make sure the labeled ingredients are all basic raw fresh fruits and veggies. If you see “added water” or anything pasteurized, you want to stay away from it – it means it’s processed. Also.. your bottle should say “cold pressed” – that is how you get the most fresh ingredients. Also – you MUST keep them refrigerated. That’s why like I mentioned above, Pressed Juciery delivered the cleanse juices in a big box with a ton of ice packs. They MUST be refrigerated and are only really good for 3 days – that’s how you know what you ordered is FRESH. And honestly, that’s a good thing. It’s how you know that you’re getting a fresh, real, all natural juice product.

Don’t try and make your own juice cleanse.

I made this mistake in the past… trying to do your own juice cleanse is not such a smart idea when you aren’t really aware of what your body needs. Don’t just run to a whole foods store, grab a bunch of random juices and call it a day. Find a company that you can trust that offers a “cleanse package.” Mine came with six juices each day and they were all different. Finding a company that does that takes the hard work out of the equation for you and lets you put it in the experts hands. The last thing you want to do is self sabotage yourself and go malnourished by not properly picking a balanced juice cleanese.

Cut out Caffeine and really sweet processed foods a few days before your cleanse. 

Our  bodies are all addicted to things.. and if you feel a need to do a juice cleanse -either for low energy reasons or craving reasons – you are most likely suffering from a sugar addiction. Try to cut out caffeine and sweets a few days in a row before you commit to a cleanse. You don’t HAVE to, but I would recommend it, only because the cleanse will be harder if you don’t.

Don’t be afraid of the Green Juices.

Honestly, They are delicious. I used to really be afraid of the high veggie juices.. but then I tried them and never went back. Honestly, after a few days in a row my body gets so used to them that I actually crave them! They may seem a little strange in the beginning of your juice cleanse, but over time you will come to actually enjoy them!

Make sure to stay hydrated. 

I think a lot of people make the mistake of not drinking water on a cleanse. – “Well.. I’m drinking juice all day so I’m good.” Absolutely not. Drink a lot of water in between your juicing. Pressed Juicery came with awesome additional waters to keep you hydrated. I would recommend getting some really pure alkaline water to drink during your cleanse.

Have fun and post tons of pictures!

Just kidding on the second part.. but sort of – Listen.. Juice cleansing is hard. You are going to have a lot of people scratching their heads asking you, “Are you crazy?” just because you are drinking your food instead of chewing it for a few days. Don’t worry. If mommy and daddy think you’re crazy, it’s okay! Just ignore your hubby while he makes fun of you and find support elsewhere. I posted a ton of pictures of my juices at the UPW event just to hold myself accountable, and I actually got a lot of support from friends once I shared my experience!


This was my favorite drink by the way. It was Vanilla Almond: juiced almonds, dates vanilla bean and sea salt. It was so delicious.



At nighttime, it was a chocolate version that was equally delicious. The added cacao created a chocolate milk vibe that was to die for. Seriously.

Thanks pressed juicer! You made my experience at UPW easy, amazing, and totally energizing! (And in case you don’t know, some days we were there for 17 hours – so the fact that I was energized was a huge huge bonus for me! Thank you!)


Zero Gravity Float Therapy = Amazing

Zero Gravity Float Therapy = Amazing

You know me – I am a sap for all things spiritual woo woo and holistic. The past two weeks I have been obsessing about going to a Crystal shop that for some reason I have not gotten to visit yet (and it’s driving me crayyyyy.)  I work every day with a salt lamp at my desk. I use essential oils and down a ton of supplements every day. And yes, every single morning, I mediate before I even brush my teeth.

That’s just how I live my life guys. Though I wasn’t always like this. But now that I am, I have to say it freaking rocks! Holistic/Spiritual Practices have become such a true core vital part of my coaching practice and my life style. And truth be told… I cannot get enough! Lately I have been in my “exploring phase,” trying new and exciting ways to add calming practices to my lifestyle – I kind of have my own little Bucket List of things I want to try.

So this weekend I was so happy to be able to cross one of those awesome things off my list! Zero-Gravity Float Therapy! And yes, Just like the title of this blog post, it was AMAZING.

For the record, I had no idea something like this existed until I found it online in a google search looking for spas in my area. I spent so much time researching the benefits of salt therapy and different forms of it’s practice since I started using Epsom Salts in my bathroom years ago. (by the way I make a killer at home detox bath recipe I always recommend – in case you can’t find  Zero gravity therapy in your area. Check out the recipe here.)

So I stumbled on Zero Gravity Therapy at A Healing Trail Wellness Center in CT. Guys… If you need a place in the Tri-State go check it out and tell them Lauren sent you! It’s amazing. The staff is incredibly kind, the place is so peaceful and serene, and there is even an adorable four pawed furry friend to greet you when you come in! Her name is Venus and she is half Husky and half Lab … I mean seriously, my heart melted (I wish I got a picture.)

The Healing Trail Wellness Center has a TON to choose from. I am going to go back for Hypnotherapy and Acupuncture for sure! But on this trip I decided to focus all of my energy into this new and exciting Zero Gravity machine. . I want to tell you all about my experience – but first…..


Zero Gravity, or, Ant-Gravity Float Therapy is weightless experience where basically – in a nut shell – you lay in a tub of water filled with tons and tons of epsom salt and you float in it for like…. an hour. There is so much salt in the water that it makes your body float “like a piece of cork.” There is no sound, no light, just darkness and let me tell you – it is freaking amazing


It heals the body and allows it to take a break from the constant state of pressure that we experience with gravity 24-7.  We don’t really it, but our bodies are constantly battling gravity – running, walking, standing, sitting, – we don’t really do anything at all that doesn’t include a pull from the earth. All of that pressure puts a constant strain on our backs, muscles and joints.  Antigravity lets your body take a break from the stress. The owner of the Healing Trail Wellness Center told me that the first time she tried it, she drove all the way up to Buffalo and after two treatments, she was relieved of her chronic back pain. Insane!!!


Well… Since we are constantly dealing with gravity, we become less aware of it’s presence and its crazy effect on us – not just our bodies but our minds. By floating in a tank with zero gravity you can become much more in tune with your body and connected to your mind.


Uh.. So MUCH. But here’s a running list from the Healing Trail Wellness Center

Benefits of Zero Gravity Float

  • Relieves pain from injuries
  • Decrease inflammation
  • Speeds the healing process
  • Increases production of endorphins
  • Relieves pain from arthritis
  • Boosts immune function
  • Relieves pain from migraines
  • Improves circulation
  • Relieves chronic back and muscle pain
  • Reduces blood pressure, heart rate & oxygen consumption
  • Promotes peaceful relaxation
  • Helps prevent sports injuries
  • Eliminates fatigue and jet lag
  • Decreases the production of cortisol
  • Heightens visualization
  • Deepens meditation
  • Diminishes depression, anxiety and fear

From the minute I stepped into the room, I was relaxed. The private area was closed off from the rest of the wellness center so you aren’t disturbed by outside noises. It really helped me remain present and focused on the experience. The room is sort of separated into three parts, there is a changing area (Where I am standing taking this picture) a showering area and then an amazing mermaid room behind the door – the actual Anti Gravity Machine.

It’s recommended that you remove all of your clothing and jewelry before going in. I think some people wear bathing suits sometimes but since it is a private machine and no one else is in it, I went full birthday suit. I think going into the experience completely naked allowed me to be more connected to my body and the experience I was having. If you wear contact lenses it is recommended that you take those out too. Then before you go in you take a shower, removing all the products from your skin and hair before going in.

And then…. the journey begins! Oh. Em. Gee.

So let me tell you  how it feels. I stayed in for a full hour, even though it is recommended your first time you actually hang out in there for a full hour and a half. It may seem like a long time, but honestly, your mind goes through all of these beautiful stages in the process of Floating, and you really need a full hour at least to process it. The room is sound proof and light proof. The have peaceful music playing with a dim green light when you walk in, but after a few minutes of getting calm I decided to go for the full experience and I shut both of those things off.

The water temperature and the room temperature are set to the same 94 degrees (If I remember correctly) and that’s I think what made the experience even more incredible. after a few moments floating, the water becomes so still that you can’t tell the difference between where the universe starts and where it begins – especially because there is no noise or light in the room. I thought about the universe, I reflected on my past, I manifested the future and I loved all of it.

IT was the deepest most peaceful meditation experience of my life. I was able to release so much anxiety, and fear during my time in the Anti Gravity Machine. It was such a beautiful indescribable experience that I am truly grateful for.

After, I got a massage. I left fully zen and full of love.

I loved it. Recommending it to all!

The Best Supplements for Mental Health.

The Best Supplements for Mental Health.

Lets face it: taking a prescribed pill never solved my problems. And I’m probably safe to say it never solved yours either. There are so many people out there battling mental health issues, and so few of them battle it in any other way besides going to the psychiatrist. We need to do do other things besides take a pill every day in order to feel balanced, healthy and mentally stable.

At least I do. (See my last post on mental health)

I remember when I was on medications from the doctor – it always started and ended the same way. I would start with one pill.. but then, side effects would come. I would have trouble sleeping. I would have trouble focusing, I would gain a ton of weight.

Problem after problem, doctors always gave me the same solution: Just take another pill to fix the side effects.

So what started as a “one pill a day recipe” turned into eight or nine or even ten.

And I never felt better.

A while back on my self love journey I decided it was time to do away with all the medication bull shit. I was so sick and tired of feeling sick and tired.  I was on a ton of different medications and nothing was working. In fact, I was only feeling worse.

So here’s what I decided: Taking a pill once a day is not solving my problems, so I need to do something different. I need to find new ways to treat my illness.

So I did. I started researching natural remedies to help combat anxiety and depression. And Soon – boom. I had my own special dose of pills to take every day – prescribed be me. And they were all 100 percent natural baby.

Guess what? My depression is none existent now. My anxiety is at bay and is easily regulated. My energy levels are coming back to normal (more on that in another post)

Full disclosure: Do not go off your medications unless consulting your doctor. Because I am not a doctor.

But I can tell you these are the suppliments that helped me feel more mentally stable and kept the brain fog at bay. And I take them religiously.


OMEGA THREE.   If you suffer from any type of emotional imbalance or mood swing issue, I highly recommend you get some type of Omega 3 Fish oil concentrate into your daily vitamin intake.  Numerous studies have shown that there is a link between anxietydepression and low blood levels of Omega 3 fats. The Brain is incredibly sensitive to cellular inflammation and one of the best ways to combat it is with omega 3. The brain is made up of two types of fatty acids and taking omega is such an added bonus to your routine. I found that just after a few weeks of taking omega 3 my mood balances out, and the highs and lows are much more balanced and calm. Solgar Omega-3 Fish Oil Concentrate Supplement, 240 Count

5-HTP MOOD SUPPORT  This is a natural supplement derived from seed pods of a plant (no not pot.) What you need to know is that this chemical directly converts to serotonin in the brain.  “Serotonin has many profoundly important functions, including a role in sleep, appetite, memory, learning, temperature regulation, mood, sexual behavior, cardiovascular function, muscle contraction, and endocrine regulation.”  I find that my mood is happier and more carefree when I take this supplement on a regular basis. 5-HTP CAN RESTORE SEROTONIN LEVELS AND HELP IMPROVE General mood, Depression, Anxiety, Insomnia, Weight loss, PMS, Chronic headaches7, Migraines”8, and Fibromyalgia. I call this Natures Prozac. Solgar, 5-HTP 100 mg, 90 Vegetable Capsules


TRUE CALM AMINO RELAXER: This is my new favorite supplement “blend. A mix of different vitamins, True Calm is mainly made up of different vitamin B’s. The first on the list: Niacin. Niacin (b-3) is a really important B vitamin. When we don’t have enough in our body we experience signs of depression, brain fog, and fatigue. B6 (also in the true calm amino relaxer) helps your body find hormone balance. Which is HUGE. Especially for people who struggle with anxiety. The third strongest vitamin in this blend is Magnesium, also known as the “most important female supplement.” Taking magnesium regularly can help with migraines, anxiety, Depression and PMS. Now Foods True Calm(tm) Amino Relaxer 90 Caps ( two-pack)


My Eating Disorder and the Valuable Lesson it Taught Me

My Eating Disorder and the Valuable Lesson it Taught Me

I never had a healthy relationship with food. Growing up in a big Italian family, food was always a center of any occasion. It was something we gathered around, something we joined together over. Something we used to celebrate and to show love. But as joyful as it sounds, growing up with a family that was very close, there was something eating away at my soul and separating me from truly celebrating those moments: My Eating Disorder.


I never really knew I had an eating disorder. I couldn’t tell you how it started, or why it started, but I can tell you the moment I recognized my body as something that was bad and needed to change. I was Seven. Yep… Seven. My friend and I were talking about our new favorite dance classes. I told her I loved my Jazz class, and that Ballet was boring. Offended by my statement, my little seven year old friend told me “Well, you wouldn’t be good at ballet anyway.”

“You have to be able to suck in your stomach,” she said.

I challenged her … showing her I could force in all my breath– sucking in all the air I could muster…. “See! I Can!” I said with a smile. Then she told me what she was trying to say all along. “No. Not like that. I mean… you have to be skinny.”

My Eating Disorder And How it Evolved

Through the years that moment, my body perception haunted me. As I got older, I wasn’t really getting attention from boys like my friends were. I blamed this on my body. And I started to believe that maybe my friend all those years ago was right. After all, I did have a belly… and my mom did tell me to suck in my stomach when she took pictures of me and my sisters. “Maybe my weight is what is holding me back,” I thought.

I wasn’t incredibly heavy, but I wasn’t skinny like most of my friends either. It was kind of like I was in this middle ground… I was on the edge of fitting in somewhere — I just didn’t know where. And like most teenagers who suffer from an eating disorder, I believed that if I gained control of my weight, I would be able to find my place in life. I would get guys to like me. I would feel more confident. I would finally have everything a teenager girl wants: LOVE.

eating disorder what is perfection

So in an effort to want to find love, I started punishing myself. I cut my calories, kept journals to log every crumb of food that touched my mouth…. and every pound I lost or gained. But the extremes of my lifestyle – eating nothing and starving my body only made my weight bounce up and down from one extreme to another…  all the way into college. Gaining and binge eating, Losing and starving, it was like I was on this rollercoaster of extremes with no middle ground.

When I started to date this guy my first year of college, I felt like I was finally in a place where feeling good about myself was possible. I started to believe that maybe my weight didn’t really matter much. But then, our relationship turned ugly… he didn’t treat me right and totally destroyed my self-esteem.. Things got really unhealthy and abusive really fast. And as a result, life got pretty dark for me after that. I got really depressed because of the way I was being treated and my self-esteem totally fell through into the deep end. I felt out of control of my life being in an abusive relationship. So I decided it was time to switch schools and head back home. And as quickly as my eating disorder had left my mind, it entered back again full force.

I felt the lowest self-worth I ever felt… and thinking that there was something wrong with me that I needed to change, the only way I could feel like I had control over my life was by forcing my body to change… in any way possible.

I starved myself. I purged. I did everything in my control to keep food from entering my life. But my eating disorder was controlling me.  I started loosing my hair. I could feel my spine poking through my shirts. And I was cold… all the time.  I dropped to under 109 pounds, losing more than 70 pounds in four months. Sure my mom wasn’t telling me to suck in my stomach anymore…. but now she was telling me I looked like a skeleton. A ghost of my former self. And even then, I felt like it wasn’t enough. I was never going to be as thin or as beautiful as I needed to find the love I was looking for… because the truth is, I was looking in all the wrong places.

Me Eating Disorder What is Perfection

The Road to Recovering from My Eating Disorder

The road to recovery was long. I gained the weight back and learned how to lose it all over again — this time, the healthy way.

The most important lesson I learned was that my body wasn’t the thing I needed to fix in order to feel good: It was my mind that needed the true repairing.

I started educating myself on emotional eating and discovered principles I now teach in my online courses— Learning to let go of my insecurities about being accomplished or “being good enough,” and learning to actually just go after what I wanted for myself… without the fear that I wasn’t worth it. I started going after my goals in a healthier way.  And I uncovered the emotional compass that led me to set goals that were achievable, goals that were confidence boosting, not destructively unhealthy.

And mainly… most importantly….I started treating my body like something that was a reflection of who I wanted to be — not something that was holding me back from being beautiful.

Slowly, I learned to let go of my eating disorder, and let in love.


eating disorder what is perfection

I’ve realized something looking back on those moments where my eating disorder was strongest…

I was fighting to change my body because I believed that the world around me would change if it did.  I thought maybe if I was skinnier I would feel better about who I was by fitting in and getting the attention and love I was seeking. I thought what would follow would be a sense of true beauty that would keep me from ever being harmed or hurt by others.

But why did I think other people were holding the key to my ability to feel good about myself?  Why did I believe changing my body would change the feelings I had toward myself — and my worth? Why couldn’t I just make effort to feel better about who I was in general?

My eating disorder taught me that finding love is about figuring out how to love yourself first. Feeling confident doesn’t come from other people. Feeling beautiful never follows any physical transformation unless you yourself embark on the emotional journey required to get there.

To all the girls out there struggling to find the body they are looking for — the body they think will bring them amazing love, or a larger amount of happiness than they already have…. the key to changing everything, starts within you….