Ahhhhh Guys! Our first book club read is officially over and I am all teary eyed. It went by so fast! If you haven’t been following along, a bunch of us in the WIP Tribe have been reading our first self improvement book tother this month. And it was seriously such an honor.
I decided I wanted to kickstart our book club read with a big bang, so I went with the dangerously titled Mark Manson book – The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck.
Sorry moms and dads… this one has a lot of foul language.
I originally picked up this book because A – I love curse words and B – I thought it would be perfect for my clients. SO many WIP Tribe Girls have a real obsession with worrying about what other people think, and I wanted to kick that fear and insecurity to the curb for them! Or at least, help them do it.
So here’s what I think of the book – and here’s what you need to know if you haven’t read it yet and are thinking about reading it.
First Thing you Need to know:
The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck is not a lesson plan for learning how to not care about your life goals.
Honestly, I was so grateful and relieved that it wasn’t – or else I would kind of be contradicting myself as a coach by recommending this book! No. Actually, Mark Manson, from the start of the book does a really really god job explaining what demeans by “not caring.” He says the secret to succeeding in life is not giving a Fuck about more, but rather, giving a fuck about less. What he means is, we are constantly overly obsessing over 15 million different areas of our life at once because we think we are “supposed to be.” When we get clear about what it is we really want in our life, we start to realize that our happiness isn’t actually wrapped into all the things we are supposed to be doing – rather, staying focused on a select few goals and dreams and trying our hardest to achieve them.
Mark Manson is Right – Half of us out there are trying to achieve things because we think we are supposed to. And that’s bullshit.
Are you going after things like buying a house or a car or settling down and getting married to have kids just because you see other people doing it? I think actually, more like 90 percent of us out there are living based on what we think we should be doing, but we never stop to really ask ourselves “Is this what I really actually want to do?” This was an awesome lightbulb moment even for me as a coach – We have to listen to ourselves and not listen to other people.
The Feedback loop from hell.
I love how Mark Manson goes into this concept through the book. Don’t know what the feedback loop from hell is? Let me explain: Here’s what happens – You see people on Facebook doing things and you think, “I should be doing that.” And then suddenly you start feeling anxious, stressed or depressed that you aren’t doing those things. “Why am I not doing what that person is doing?” you start to ask yourself. Then you notice you are anxious stressed and depressed and you start telling yourself, “OMG I shouldn’t feel this way!” And then you start beating yourself up for feeling anxious, stressed or depressed only to feel even MORE stressed, anxious and depressed. It’s a crazy feedback loop from hell. Here’s the solution: Simply stop giving a fuck. Focus on what you want and not what other people are doing or what other people are telling you that you should be doing.
Failure and Success are Arbitrary.
There is really no such thing as either of those words. In fact, Failure and success are just made up terms we use as a reason to feel good or bad for ourselves. The people who “succeed” in life actually fail a MILLON times before achieving their goals. Honestly. You succeed once and you are “successful,” but what you don’t see is the fact that that person had to fail a bajillion times to get where they are today. So being a failure is actually a good thing.
This Book Is Great For someone who…
Loves curse words.
Is constantly comparing themselves to people on social media.
Is feeling depressed sad or stuck in their life
Is scared of trying or living in fear constantly
Has no idea what decision he or she wants to make for themselves.
Wants to change and improve life but isn’t quite sure where to start.
Is sick and tired of feeling like absolute shit <3