How to Stop Being Insecure

How to Stop Being Insecure

As a life coach, I am constantly being asked this question, and today I want to answer it. Because learning how to stop being insecure is one of the most important things you can do for yourself. But reality check: It’s also one of the hardest things to do, right?

If you’re the girl struggling to feel good about yourself, well guess what. I’m going to help you change that. So let’s dive into my simple tips for learning how to stop being insecure.

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Insecurities and Your Self-Esteem

Before I found my self confidence and learned how to stop being insecure, I swear, I hated everything about myself. I was constantly nitpicking my physical appearance – like my outfits and the shape of my body – because I hated how I looked. Also, it was hard to feel good about myself when I achieved things like getting a good job or good grades. I was constantly thinking “I need to do better.”

I thought that I needed to change things about myself to feel good, but really, the only thing I needed to change was my attitude and how I perceived myself. So I did. Once I started practicing these simple steps for learning how to stop being insecure, and over time, things changed.

 

Steps for Learning How to Stop Being Insecure

1. Don’t deny your insecurity. When you aren’t feeling good about yourself, your first gut instinct is probably to fight it. “I want this feeling to just go away!” is probably a common thought you have from time to time. But when you ignore your insecurity or try to stuff it down and pretend it isn’t there, it always makes things worse.

2. Embrace your insecurity. This may seem silly, but it’s an important part of learning how to stop being insecure. Recognize your insecurity, whatever it is, and try to accept it as a beautiful part of who you are. “I am insecure about my acne, and that’s okay because I’m just a normal human being. And everyone is insecure about something, right?” Read my post titled “I am insecure” if you want to know more about this.

3. Practice self love affirmations and journal reflections. A big part of what I do as a self improvement coach and self-confidence leader is teaching other woman personal development techniques for living a happy life. There a ton of journaling ideas and worksheets for building your self worth. Every day spend a little time journaling about what you love about yourself, what makes you special and what you are most proud of.  Check out this post on daily journal prompts for growing self confidence if you need ideas.

4. Avoid people who make you feel insecure. This is a big important one guys. As emotional beings, we can really easily feed off the vibes of others. If you negative people in your life who constantly make you feel “less than,” then it may be time to find other people to share your life with. Find a healthy support system to lift you up and make you feel good. I recommend taking some time reflecting on the people you share your life with and slowly start weeding out the people who you have unhealthy relationships with. By pushing out the negative influencers, you will have more room for happy people who help you grow your self confidence.

5. Invest in yourself and make a change. One of my favorite quotes out there is “nothing changes if nothing changes.” If you are constantly trying to learn how to stop being insecure but feel stuck in your progress, it may be time to take a step out of the box and hire a life coach. There are a ton of phony’s out there so steer clear of anything that sounds too good to be true. Do your research and find a self improvement program or course that targets self confidence and self image. I highly recommend that you check out my online course for growing self confidence. It’s called the Perfection Program. I’ve coached hundreds of women on amazing life transformation journeys. If you feel ready to change your life, go check it out.

 

Need an extra confidence boost? Check out the free Daily writing guide!!!

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Lena Dunham’s FB Post Saying Goodbye to Girls is giving me life right now.

Lena Dunham’s FB Post Saying Goodbye to Girls is giving me life right now.

And I need to talk about it. Lena Dunham you are my hero. And not because you wrote this FB post… because quite frankly I’ve been in love with you for a long time now. Seriously. I’m not kidding. I legit  have dreams where you, Lena are my BFF and we are hanging outside a restaurant in central park drinking margaritas and talking about our favorite podcast episodes of This American Life. I live vicariously through her life – who she is and what she has created is such a solid representation of Embracing WHO YOU ARE.  And I am so sad that your beautiful creation is over. Your Facebook Post saying Goodbye to HBO Girls is bringing tears to my eyes.

Lena Dunham’s FB Post Saying Goodbye to Girls HBO

Lena Dunham is a total rockstar. Ever since the first episode of Girls on HBO I have been so obsessed with her ability to be honest and vulnerable about who she is. A lot of people think she is “too much.” And those people are wrong. She is open and honest and sure, naked a lot; but it was for a good reason.  The character she played, Hannah Horvath, was constantly wearing her heart on her sleeve and not giving a shit what other people think. She was trying to find herself in an awkward world where people always pretend to have their shit together. Lena Dunham shed light on the true struggles we face trying to find ourselves in this world.

And I loved that. I loved that about Hannah and I loved Lena Dunham for dreaming up a character who lived life that way. Because whether or not you felt it 100 percent of the time, I guarantee sh was relatable to you on some level.

Lena Dunham Made Me Believe That What I Experienced Growing Up Was Real. And Okay.

HBO Girls was a show I totally resonated with on so many levels. It made me look back on my life experiences and realize that a lot of people go through the struggle of trying to find themselves growing up. When I made mistakes or did embarrassing things, it was okay. Girls allowed me to look back on things I did growing up and things I felt growing up and feel like they were okay. “I wasn’t the only one.”

 

 

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Lena Dunham Facebook Post End of Girls

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Oh.. and if you still don’t think she is awesome you should check out this post

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What is Perfection is the Self Improvement blog for the imperfect girl everywhere. Learn to find happiness, feel beautiful, and be confident in who you are. We all deserve to be happy, and we all deserve to be the best version of us. And we all are truly capable of getting there. Because Perfection Is Impossible. Happiness isn’t. See The Self Improvement E-Guide Collection For Your Life Coaching Guides to Change Your Life Today!

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Natural Skin Care Tips for Feeling Beautiful

Natural Skin Care Tips for Feeling Beautiful

Every time the summer ends and winter rolls around, life starts feeling cold, dry and itchy. Literally. The cold weather and change in season makes my skin fickle and a little more sensitive than usual. Having a solid go to survival practice for treating my skin in the winter season is essential for feeling beautiful. So today I wanted to share some of those awesome natural skin care tips so you can have that beautiful glow no matter what season!

 

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Natural Skin Care Tips

The Simple Natural Skin Care Tips for Self-Care

Natural Beauty Tip One: Don’t use too many products. I never realized how important that was until I started getting compliments on my skin! I don’t use a lot of products on my face or body (actually I hardly use any.) And even when I do, I try to keep those products as natural as possible. But if you do need to use chemically based products, I always recommend keeping it basic. Don’t use too many different kinds in one week. Keep things as simple as possible.

Natural Beauty Tip Two: Keep A Routine. I make it a point to have some sort of natural skin care treatment on my face at least once a week. Adding that to my routine keeps my care consistent  and I don’t forget to treat myself. Every night I do something special for my skin – either moisturize with a coconut oil, exfoliate with a sugar scrub, or reduce my puffy eyes with a little face mask.

Natural Beauty Tip Three: Don’t Just Treat Your Face. Treat Your whole body. This is really important on my list natural skin care tips because without treating my whole body, I wouldn’t get that full effect glow for feeling confident and beautiful. Whatever I do to my face, I always try to do something consistent to the rest of my body. If I am exfoliating my face, I’ll dry brush my legs and arms. If I am trying to moisturize, I am sure to do it from head to toe. It gives my confidence an extra boost!

Natural Beauty Tip Four: Moisturize in the most natural way possible. I am always using coconut oil to treat my skin and moisturize regularly. You can read all about it in this post. The most natural moisturizer is best for keeping your pores clean and healthy.

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Natural Skin Care Recipes and Tips – More!

Okay… now the fun stuff. RECIPES AND HOW TO TIPS!!

These are my go-to favorite natural skin care recipes on my list of go to natural skin care tips. These are in my back pocket at all times!

Dry Brushing How To 

DIY Sugar Scrub 

DIY Grapefruit Cellulite Scrub

Homemade Body Wash Recipe 

Detox Bath Recipe 

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What is Perfection is the Self Improvement blog for the imperfect girl everywhere. Learn to find happiness, feel beautiful, and be confident in who you are. We all deserve to be happy, and we all deserve to be the best version of us. And we all are truly capable of getting there. Because Perfection Is Impossible. Happiness isn’t. See The Self Improvement E-Guide Collection For Your Life Coaching Guides to Change Your Life Today!

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Gratitude Journal Prompts [Free Worksheet!]

Gratitude Journal Prompts [Free Worksheet!]

Okay, so let’s talk about gratitude for a minute. Because learning how to feel grateful is such an important part of feeling happy, confident and proud of your life. So let me show you how with today’s post on gratitude journal prompts and the free worksheet for you! But first…read this:

What Is Gratitude- Exactly?

In case you need a reminder, on what gratitude is before you jump into the gratitude journal prompts, here’s what you need to know:

Gratitude is that awesome emotion of appreciation. It’s what keeps you feeling happy about what you have in your life instead of feeling frustrated about what you don’t have yet.

-It’s the emotion that warms your heart when  someone surprises you with a present.
-It’s that feeling you get after you have a romantic date with a boyfriend.
-It’s the way your soul lights up after someone gives you a compliment.

But the truth is you need to learn how to feel grateful on your own. You can’t just rely on what the people do for you. You need to make gratitude happen on your own. Get what I’m sayin’ girl? And you need to practice with gratitude journal prompts.

Like right now, for example, I got that feel-good-vibe like crazy yo. Because last night I had the most amazing dream that Justin Bieber was my boyfriend. And he was super sexy. YUP. Thank you awesome REM Cycle sleep and gratitude-vibes. Because this morning I feel happy, positive, and grateful. And even though it’s because of the smallest silliest thing, it doesn’t matter: I feel good. And that’s a big deal!

What Happens When You Aren’t Grateful?

If I wasn’t embracing that gratitude feeling right now, I’m pretty sure this is what I’d be feeling instead:

-Stressed (because I have a lot of work to do today)
-Disappointed (because I didn’t wake up early enough to start my work)
-Angry (because I should have been more responsible and woken up on time)
-Sad (because  I didn’t reach my Monday goal of going out for a run)
But do I feel that way? No! Because I am grateful! 
I WAS HAVING JUSTIN BIEBER SEXY DREAMS GUYS!

See… when you truly embrace gratitude, it is actually hard to feel negative about whatever’s going on in our life.

You can’t feel angry if you feel grateful. You can’t feel sad if you feel grateful.

Practicing gratitude is the quickest easiest way to start feeling more wonderful about who you are and the life you live.

Not a guru in gratitude practice? That’s okay. You just need to work at it. Here’s how…Journaling! (with my free gratitude journal prompts worksheet in this post)

Why You Need Gratitude Journal Prompts –

Sometimes you can’t just start feeling grateful out of the blue… especially if you aren’t used to it.

I remember when my little sister had her prom. She got her makeup done, her hair styled, and her nails did. She looked like a total princess. Seriously, she was beautiful. She was feeling so happy and so confident, but the minute she put on her dress a switch went off in her brain and BOOM- she felt horrible. She was so obsessed with her stomach and how it looked in her tight fitting gown. Suddenly she felt really ugly and really sad.

It was literally like a switch went off in her brain and completely changed how she was feeling in an instant.

Has this ever happened to you? Have you ever done a bunch of things to feel great, but then one small thing brings you down?

Gratitude journal prompts will help you re-train your brain so that you can switch from a sad state to a happy and grateful state in a quick short amount of time.

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Gratitude Journal Prompt Tips:

If you are used to feeling negative and unappreciative, it’s going to be much easier to feel that way. And you’re gonna need some help changing that mindset practice. So I created these gratitude journal prompts – so you can learn how to  feel more grateful more frequently.

But if you are new to gratitude journaling, read this post on how to start a gratitude journal. Here are some tips for when you start:

-Ask yourself positive questions whenever you feel stuck or in a rut. Positive questions will help you retrain your brain to think differently about yourself and about your life. Make sure those questions are emotionally charged and phrased in a way that you are forced to think of the positive.

If you are feeling lonely because you don’t have a boyfriend for example, take out your gratitude journal, and write down all the reasons you should be grateful you DON’T have a boyfriend right now. “What positive opportunities does being single right now offer you?”

If you are feeling unbeautiful because you haven’t reached a weight-loss goal or you struggle with acne, why not try to make a list of all the ways you should feel good about your exterior image? “What about your beauty are you appreciative of right now?”

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GET YOUR GUIDE FOR GRATITUDE JOURNALING HERE

How to Feel More Confident

How to Feel More Confident

It’s the forever unanswered question for so many women out there. Sure, maybe we ask it in different ways, like, “How can I feel more beautiful?” or “How can I feel more comfortable in my skin?” No matter how you phrase it, it’s all boiling down to the same basic longing; the desire for learning how to feel more confident and good about yourself.

In a world where we are constantly struggling to boost our self-esteem, it’s hard to figure out how to feel more confident. That’s probably why you’re reading this post – because you want to know how to feel more confident. Well, all you need is a basic understanding of these simple steps to change how you feel about who you are. So let’s dive in!
how to feel more confident

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How to Feel More Confident- Embrace What You Have.

This is step one in learning how to feel more confident. Because without this first step, you won’t get anywhere. Learning to feel more comfortable in your skin and boost your self-esteem is not about changing who you are.

But I’m guessing maybe you’ve thought that for a while. – Well, nip that belief in the butt right now!

“If I lose weight,” then I will be confident.”

or

“If I got a boob job, then I could feel more confident.”

or how about:

“If I found a boyfriend, then I would finally feel good about myself.”

Any of these questions ring a bell? Sound familiar?

I’ve been there. Trust me. Along my own journey, before I found self love, I was super fixated on all the things I wanted to change about myself. I firmly believed that if I could finally change my body, and my self image, then I would finally end my struggle with how to feel more confident.

It didn’t work that way.

No matter what goals I reached in my life, they never made me feel good about myself the way I wanted them to. No magic lightbulb turned on that suddenly made me find self confidence.

Want to know why?

Because confidence is not something that suddenly sparks the minute you reach a goal or get your idea body: Confidence is a self-love practice that you need to work on every single day of your life.

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So, if you are trying to learn how to feel more confident, your first step should not be changing how you look or how you act. Your first step in learning how to feel more confident is looking at who you are right here and right now.

“What is it about me that I like?”

“What is it about who I am that makes me feel good?”

“How can I embrace those feel good feelings more often?”

When you start developing the emotional tools for feeling good about yourself in the present moment, you open the door to self love now, and the possibility of actually growing that love in the future.

Self love is like gardening: You can’t grow something from nothing. You need to plant a seed first.

 

 Step Two for Learning How to Feel More Confident: Understanding The Feelings that Make up Self-Confidence.

Okay, so you’ve done step one for learning how to be more confident. You’ve asked yourself what you like about who you are right here and now. Great! You’ve planted the seed!

Now you are ready for step two: Understanding what exactly makes self-confidence.

the Four Feels of Confidence how to feel more confident what is perfection

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See this chart? These are the four solid components for creating a better you and feeling more confident you. When you reflect on these individual areas of your life, I am sure you can come  up with several examples to feel good about. Confidence does not come from one specific area of our lives. Confidence comes from building a solid foundation of multiple emotions.

Understanding that confidence does not come from one specific outlet is important: We are diverse human beings with diverse reasons to feel good.

How to Feel More Confident Step Three: Find a Balance

Even if one of these areas of your life seems super important and valuable to you right now, remember this: Balancing your focus on all four of these areas (and not just one) will help you become more confident and happy. If we show love and care for all four areas of our lives with equal attention, then we can become the confident person we deserve to be. So start asking yourself what you can do to find confidence in EACH Place of your life, not just one of these areas. Write it out if it helps!

What Makes Self Confidence

So you’ve got those three steps down: awesome. Way to go girl! Now grab the free self-confidence E-Guide so you can learn more about who you are and how to be more confident!

This E-guide will teach you how to focus on the certain areas of self improvement that you have forgotten about and learn to love yourself all over again! Plus, it’s free!

Want more tips on self improvement? Check out this post: 3 Simple Steps for Building Self-Esteem

 

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Sign up for Your Free Life Coach Guide! Find Confidence, Feel Beautiful and Transform your Happiness step by step. Make an Amazing Change for Your Life. I'll give you the tools to make it happen!

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Divider what is perfection

What is Perfection is the Self Improvement blog for the imperfect girl everywhere. Learn to find happiness, feel beautiful, and be confident in who you are. We all deserve to be happy, and we all deserve to be the best version of us. And we all are truly capable of getting there. Because Perfection Is Impossible. Happiness isn’t. See The Self Improvement E-Guide Collection For Your Life Coaching Guides to Change Your Life Today!

Divider what is perfection