Never, ever, ever in my life did I think I would audition for a reality TV show. Let alone go to a bachelor audition. But I did!
Because somehow, under the influence of nearly 20 girl friends, I was convinced that I should audition to be a contestant on The Bachelor. So there was an open casting call in NYC. And I went. My first ever bachelor audition experience was crazy!
And even my aunt called me and said I should go to the casting call. How come out of nowhere EVERYONE THINKS I SHOULD BE ON THE BACHELOR?
My Bachelor Audition
Going to my first ever casting call for the bachelor
So, I wasn’t going to go at first. My first reason for not going was, “I can’t, I have rehearsal.” But when my stage manager texted me that our rehearsal got moved to a different night, I took it as “the sign” to go.
Then I did a photo fashion show with a group of girl friends to help me figure out the perfect outfit. I got my hair blown out, got my nails done, and perfected my winged liner.
As I sat on the Long Island Railroad, I had many thoughts running through my head:
“This is hilarious. I am going to a bachelor audition.”
“They’d never even cast me.”
“But what if they did?”
“OMG what if I’m ‘crying girl?'”
“OH MY GAWD THEYRE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE ME LOOK LIKE WEIRD DISNEY FREAK GIRL.”
“Don’t bring up Disney, Gabrielle.”
“I really hope there’s wine at this thing.”
HERE I GO. I’M WALKING TO ABC STUDIOS TO BE WEIRD DISNEY FREAK GIRL ON THE BACHELOR.
If you’ve ever watched any reality tv show, you’ll often hear someone say, “I’m not here to make friends.” Hey, I like friends. Maybe I can make some friends at this shindig. Would the girls be bitchy and stand offish? Would they look at my face and just know that I am crying girl or Disney-freak girl. It turns out everyone I met was so sociable, nice and BEAUTIFUL! Why are there this many beautiful, single girls in NYC?! Guys, get your SHIT together, you’re about to lose us to the next Bachelor!
Well I got very lucky and showed up about 30 minutes early and was in, what appeared to be the ABC dining area, by 6 pm. I assume it was the dining area because I looked like the ABC Commissary in Disney’s Hollywood Studios. God dammit, I’m being weird Disney girl.
So here’s the run down of how a Bachelor audition works:
Step 1: Walk through metal detector.
Step 2: Pick up application as everyone behind the table tells you look so beautiful BECAUSE THEY KNOW YOU ARE WEAK. There will be tons of pens on the table that say THE BACHELOR. Hold onto this. Cherish this. This is may be the closest thing you get to actually being on The Bachelor
Step 3: Walk over to man in suit and get your photograph taken. I had to write my name and phone number on a white board and pose with it while they took my picture (why didn’t I bring my head shots?!)
Step 4: Fill out the said application for bachelor audition. There were some pretty normal questions on there. They asked questions about my hobbies, interests, how many serious relationships I’ve had and why they didn’t work out, my occupation, what I look for in a guy, and why I want to be on the Bachelor. Throw THE BACHELOR pen in your bag discretely.
Step 5: Attend a middle school birthday party and play musical chairs with all the nice girlfriends you just met. Literally. We just sat around a table and moved from one chair to the next, waiting to be called for a face-to-face interview. Why isn’t there a better system than this?! During this time though I got to chat with more girls, add a few on Facebook, and got some compliments on my Kylie lip kit. Thanks, ladies!!
Step 6: Pretend you’re on reality television. Once musical chairs were over, I got called up to hand in my application to a woman named Lauren. Lauren hooked up a microphone to my dress, had me look in the camera and say my name, age, and where I’m from. It took me back to the days of chat rooms (ASL?). Once again I got to hold a white board with my name and phone number on it. Then Lauren asked me questions very similar to the ones in my application packet. I explained my job as a speech-language pathologist, my passion for fitness, and my past relationships. On the topic of fitness, Lauren asked what I do.
Gabby: “I actually started a fitness Instagram a few years ago and it’s grown tremendously. I’m studying personal training so I can go in the direction of online training programs!”
Lauren: “Wow that’s cool! How many followers do you have?”
G: *bashfully* “Um, 26K…”
L: “Oh my GOD!”
I think that just helped me.
My final question was why I wanted to be on the Bachelor.
Um, because real life men suck? Because tinder is awful?
G: “Well, I haven’t had a serious relationship in 4 years, and just no one’s swept me off my feet. I think it’s time to try something different and exciting!”
And with that it was a handshake, a “good luck” from Lauren, and a quick exit. I noticed as I left the line wrapped around the block. Thank goodness I came early!
So here’s my advice if you ever want to go to a bachelor audition: Dress comfortably. Doll yourself up. Arrive early. And just be yourself!! Because even if you don’t get on the show, it’ll make a great story to tell your friends and family. And maybe your therapist.
P.S. There was no wine at this thing.